Genius! Genius! Genius!

Holy ass-fucked Christ! I have More Crazy Hits, the forthcoming Crazy Frog album, and I am the most rad motherfucker in the universe because of it. Fuck the entire ESP catalogue, Joan La Barbara and her slightly choleric aunt, Derek Bailey's manicurist, Otto Muehl's film of Harry Partch blowing a dead horse on Fassbinder's doorstep, the unpaid bar tabs from the Viking Lounge's "Special Extermination" fiesta, and every unreleased 1973 Suicide rehearsal stashed for safekeeping in Marty Rev's traverse colon. The is the real murder cache! Stack your insipid Boyd Rice brownshirt fantasies from Connecticut to the Crab Nebula, commander the Penn Station public address system and scream "Sutcliffe Jugend!" for 5,000 years... No avail, fundamentalist dipshits! There's just no fucking comparison. More Crazy Hits is total sex, total joy, total communication! You bought the This Heat box, think yourself well-versed in Jandek arcana? Go fuck yourself. You cannot get more underground than the Crazy Frog overground!



The alb, for real? Okay, it's not 1000% flawless, but at moments - CF's covers of the Knight Rider theme and Europe's "The Final Countdown," to name two - it veers into an absolute, pants-shitting insanity Rudolf Eb.er hasn't yet begun to perfect. (And that's no dig on Mr. E., who is as cool as they fucking come... It's just that Reinhard Raith and Henning Reith are willing to go further into realms of pure corporate pornography than anyone, anywhere.) Crazy Frog is but a herald, a precursor. In ten years' time our sounds will be infinitely more distressed (i.e., mega-glossed) - they'll have to be! Noise, by comparison, will be wholly without effect, at best a mildly diverting ceiling fan oscillation. Full commercial (mind/body/data) immersion will be on the menu of the Harry Pussies of the near future. Mark these words...

Listen and explode into the future!

(Tracks edited by TS for this preview.)

Frog in the House (Knightrider)

The Final Countdown

Get it, run with it, destroy everything else. Yeah Yeah Yeahs are Seals and Crofts...

PS: When C2 and I brought out G. Moore's cake on the 10th, we serenaded him with Crazy's "We Are the Champions"... I've been listening to a loop of More Crazy's "Final Countdown" for the last fifteen minutes - this is the coolest fucking thing I've ever heard. No shit, no irony - I saw the Pop Group in '80, the Pistols in '78, shopped for Studio 1 dubplates at 99 Recs, smoked a spliff with Keith Hudson backstage at Tier 3, and dodged ashtrays and bottles hurled by angry Bad Company fans while dancing to live Ramones at Atlanta's hippie-ass Electric Ballroom on Thanksgiving Day, 1976, but this sweeps previous experiences, everything, to Hell. Astonishing...

Comments

Tetley's teabag said…
but is it better than sex with tom smith?!?




security code ended in fuk...uh huh.
ommyth said…
OM was forced to alter copy; LM is dead, and hubris never becomes us... I've inserted other memories into the frog matrix.

xox
Tetley's teabag said…
silly boy! what i meant was: is crazy frog better than having sex with tom smith? rhetorical question, btw.

yes, it's best to leave the deceased out of it. they can't defend themselves...
Spaulding007 said…
The REAL question is...

Is it better than sex with Tom JONES?!
ommyth said…
I'm staying the Hell away from this sex fray; I suggest we meditate on Crazy Frog...

TS
isaac said…
in the flesh
utter brilliance. reminds me of the sheer joy of crunk, down-south ringtones blowing up in supermarkets, subways everywhere.
ommyth said…
AWESOME!! Thanks for the CF pic, issac. Well done, sir!

TS
tetley's teabag said…
00, i'm kind of worried about you...septuagenarian sex or fantasy-bestiality? but i have to say it's, um, ORIGINAL!

tom jones vs. crazy frog...is there any contest?

om, are you gonna post said pic?
Spaulding007 said…
Tom Jones is Crazy Frog
isaac said…
on an incredibly tangentical note, have the shave ever performed with Occasional Detroit?
mikey, who dons a blanket said…
yeah, that's what the shave needs...
A MASCOT. people love cg animals possibly even more than walmart. i already got some ideas, tom.
Spaulding007 said…
How about a spastic, cock-eyed baby pterodactyl?
ommyth said…
Our mascot should be a pasty and enervated Barbara Bush leaving a back alley abortionist's hut in May, 1946. She's already stuffed and semi-fluffy, so we have that bit covered...

TSsssss
Spaulding007 said…
Even better!
Tetley's teabag said…
barbara bush is a fantastic choice! fascism is not a game to be played by children like you.

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